Hey guys, remember me??

This is probably not the most earth-shattering news to post for my big, triumphant, come-back post, but I'm warming back up slowly.
I came across this on The Onion, which, believe me, I know is soooooo freshman year, but I just read the main page and never really look at all of the linked articles on the left. Lo and behold, apparently they have stuff like this:

I wish some small-town newspaper would come across this and run it, for reals. By the way, I think that is baby Byrom making his cartoon debut as "Liberty Jr."